finally am happy

finally everything's been great for me!! finally i'm learning what happiness is,... after like a bejillion years of not knowing what I want or what makes me happy, now I know...
life's been chill lately though midterms are coming whamming to my face right this second. I know it, nothing I can do about it though.
Just got back from TAHOE!! for President's day weekend. went with my roomate I haven't talked to or hang out to a lot lately cos i'm always with ron (which we will discuss in a short time) and spent time with her family and all. It WAS a truly an american family, I mean they eat turkey and stuff, what can be more american than that. I've had more turkey in 3 days than i've had my entire life... isn't that amazing. they eat so healthy, so I figured that there are 3 major classifications of americans : 1.ignorant americans who sit in front of the TV all the time doing nothing and getting fat, mostly living in the midwest
2. Coast americans consisting of people who live on the coast and are more liberal and therefore open minded and internationally inclined. who work out and eat healthy and are crazy about ORGANIC stuff (whatever that means...) and like to party but are hard workers and are probably the more affluent people of the USA. they dress up nice and all, and these people are the kinda people that you see on sitcoms like sex in the city etc. but NO, OC is NOT real and stuff like that do NOT happen. Its so weird when people ask me the stereotypical american things that they see on tv hoping that i'd confirm their firm belief on what americans are like. but NO, they are NOT all pretty and skinny with big boobs, they are NOT the smartest people on earth, they are just genius manipulators.
3. The outdoorsy type who also like healthy food and generally live in the more challenging part of the US like oregon or washington or even north cal...

Anyways I went to my roomie's Sarah's home and fits more into this stupid broad general classification number 3. They make their own composts for god's sake.. so they collect like dry leaves and put them under plastic waiting for it to turn black so they can use it for fertilizers. GOD! thats smart or what!!
anyways, she invited me over to her place that is so homy and cosy and i really liked it. Her family is a crazy-hippie type which makes me happy :) anyways we went snowboarding to this really nice place in tahoe, northstar and the snow was good and it makes me so happy. they stayed at this MANSION-CABIN thing right in front of lake tahoe and it is SO GORGEOUS, its splendid.. view was really great, loved it. Ron asked me to go snowboarding again next week. i guess i'll go i didn't get as much skiing as i'd like to.
anyways her family was super nice and loving, i think i really like that. I'm genuinely happy :) oh oh and after a harsh day of crazy ass snowboarding we went to the hot tub that is steaming hot outdoor and it was snowing while we were in the hot tub and it feels so good to have snow on your face while your body is steaming hot.. GREAT :)
we even made snowmen too. Will post the pic as soon as i get them.

oh so i've been complaining about ron LOTS lately, i feel like a whiner. but everythings been going really great lately its beautiful. so we had this huge fight a coupla weeks ago about how we always argue and how it ends up with me manipulating everything and blaming him for everthing he does and not wanting to lose the arguments. I don't know i guess i've never been this involved in a relationship that it scares the shit outta me. seriously. I had to be in control all the time because I feel that if i'm not then i've sacraficed myself for the wrong thing. so the first year of our relationship its always been about me being hurt, about him being insensitive and such. good thing he's very patient and understanding or else he would've probably hung me somewhere and leave me to die slowly. anyways... so we had this long talk and we agreed that we're gonna start from beginnning and i'll try to accomodate more to his opinions so that he'd be able to express his feelings more (which he hadn't done in our 2.5 yr of relationship). yeap thats right peeps i'm an angry manipulative bitch. its so sad. i'm only mean to him i think and i try so hard to be pleasant to other people and just bash it on him whenever i have problems. but i've been so understanding and he's been so responsive and expressive it makes everything a lot easier since there are less misunderstandings. we've talked great, and we get along so well lately it makes me HAPPY :)

oh god i've got so many midterms.. DONT! argh.. i've been totally chill though

OH I HAVE TO LOSE 8 FREAKING POUNDS... i HAVE NO IDEA how i'm gonna do it. i've gotta lose it to be in a lower weight class division for taekwondo. Cos i'm right in the middle of my weight class so that the people in my weight class are the people who are 8 pounds heavier than the cap of my weight class and have lost weight. so they are like 12 pounds heavier than me. WHICH SUCKED. so i've gotta lose 8 pounds, i've lost 2 so far with very hard work. 4 of it would probably be water weight that i'm gonna lsoe the day of, but i swear i've been eating so healthy lately (except for this weekend) but yea i've been working out everyday (well almost) and i'm actually enjoying training which starting to scare me. I train like 3 hours daily like 6 times a week. its crazy but its been fun,. we'll see for like 1 more week and i'll start complaining. so i've got 3 weeks to lose 6-8 pounds cos we're gonna have this UC open competition which is a huge competition in california where people from the west coast go to and spar. and in 7 weeks i'll have the nationals. FREAK!! pressure's freakin on girl!! i'm not gonna eat i swear. I eat so freaking much!! ah :(

but yea generally have been really happy and glad and grateful :)
i think its only gonna last for like 3 days :)